I just waisted one hour of my day doing absolutely nothing of value…

I sat down with the intention of writing something worth reading, I planned to spend one hour focused without distractions. I hid my phone from my sight to avoid having the constant reminder to pick it up and check FB or IG…

And yet, I failed to concentrate, I sat and stare at the blank screen and couldn’t find the motivation to write. 

So what did I do next? 

I picked up the phone. I started scrolling through FB and IG, I checked my email. I stood up and went to the bathroom, I drank a glass of water, I picked up a book to see if I get inspired and yet, I couldn’t come up with anything… and then it downed on me…one whole hour gone!

How is that the time just flies away so quickly and how come we don’t take it more seriously? 

When I saw the clock and that I lost 60 precious minutes of my day, I felt horrible…how can I just waste my time like that? I will not be able to get those minutes, why can’t I focus and concentrate? Why can’t I be productive and use my time wisely? Don’t I understand that I only have so much time? Why can’t I get the sense of urgency? 

Have you ever felt this way? 

Have you ever planned for something, have great ideas and wanted to do so much with your day, only to end up doing nothing? And then, you ended up feeling so bad because you didn’t do what you planned to? Because instead of refocusing you started doing mindless activities to avoid thinking and avoid feeling bad? 

Oh it really sucks when you feel like this…at the end of the day instead of feeling productive and accomplished, you feel like a failure…The only thing you can do is think about all the ideas and plans that you didn’t accomplished and you feel like a lazy bum because you didn’t do any of it…

I don’t like feeling unproductive, I don’t like feeling like I waste my time, it really ticks me off and yet…I still fall on the trap of wasting one hour doing nothing valuable…

How can we avoid doing that?

What can we do to regain power over our behaviors and control what we want to do?

How can we stop ourselves from doing things that we know we don’t like? 

Those are tough questions to answer…

What I can share is what I’ve noticed in my own life, and what it seems to get me back on track with my plans…

Years ago, I wasn’t too conscious about how wasting time was an issue for me. I didn’t have a clear purpose and I didn’t have the clarity of what I wanted to accomplish, so I was going through life in autopilot without much thinking and without awareness.

But, when I started to get clear about what I wanted to do with my life and why I wanted to do it, I started noticing a lot more those times that were not aligned with my purpose. I had a shift in my priorities. 

As an example, when I was younger and I had to study, I wasn’t motivated, I wasn’t doing what I really liked and I would look for any excuse to do anything but sitting and studying. I would go out and do errands, I would get on cleaning the house, vacuuming, mopping, dusting…whatever it was that kept me from studying…

But, nowadays, if I have a free day, all I want to do is sit down and work on my business, I want have time to learn something new, I want to sit down and read, I want to write, I want to create content…and now when I have to vacuum, dust, clean the house…all I can think off is how quick can I get it done so I can get back to do what I want to…

Before I was clear on my purpose, I cleaned the house to distract myself, after I was clear on my purpose, I clean because I have to, not as a distraction (I like to live in a clean house after all…).

So, what would be my first suggestion if you want to stop yourself from doing things that are not valuable to you? 

👉🏼 Understand what do you want to do and why you want to do it. Have a CLEAR PURPOSE, know your why. 

That way, when you are doing things in autopilot that are not bringing you joy and value, you can stop and ask yourself what I call the FILTER question: “Is this that I am doing right now getting me closer to my goal?”.

If it is, keep on doing it, if it’s not, stop.

The second idea that works together with the first one is about SELF-AWARENESS. 

If you are not aware of the things you are doing, it will be difficult to know how to stop doing them. 

If you want to spend time with your kids, and you start checking your phone while you are with them, and you are not aware that you are engaged with your phone instead of listening to them, you will not be able to change that behavior. 

👉🏼 So, the second idea is about PAYING ATTENTION to your behavior.

When do you pick up the phone and start scrolling without a purpose? When do you turn on TV and watch shows to fill your day? What are the things that you do that keep you disconnected from your purpose? 

Learn about yourself and what you use to get distracted, then follow up with the next step…

👉🏼 Finally, the third idea that helps getting back on track is to BE RADICALLY HONEST with yourself. 

Calling yourself out when you are getting out of track. Being able to speak to yourself and calling yourself out on your lack of focus. 

And, I am not saying here that you put yourself down with negative name calling. For me, what I do is recognizing that I am slacking and reminding myself of my purpose. I call out my bad behavior without getting myself down as a person. What helps me is to call myself out by name, I’ll say something like: “Sofia, what the heck are you doing!?…”

Something that helps out for this is ASKING BETTER QUESTIONS, when you recognize that you are slacking out and want to get back on track, instead of asking “Why” questions, ask yourself “What” and “How” questions.

Don’t blame yourself and victimize your behavior asking things like Why I can’t focus? Why am I so lazy? Why am I wasting my time? 

Instead ask yourself productive questions such as How can I focus better? What can I do to use my time better? What are the things that are getting on my way? How can I feel more productive at the end of the day? 

So, yes, I started feeling bad and calling myself out for losing one hour of my day today, I started wondering why, and I was going down the road of asking the “why” type of questions, starting to feel bad and lazy…but then, I remembered what I’ve learned these past years, I remembered my why, I recognized that I was scrolling aimlessly on my phone, I called myself out on my behavior, and I ask myself better questions…and then I brought back my focus…

And now, I want to hear from you, what do you do so you can feel in control of your time and your days? How do you get yourself back into focus? How do you avoid wasting time when you know you want to be more productive and feel better? 

Share below, I’d love to hear your tips!

xoxo, 

Sofia