Four habits to handle the stress during the holidays
If you are anything like me, you are probably wondering what happened to this year? Where has it gone?
How is it that it’s almost done? I know I said these many times before and I seem to repeat this every year, but it does seem like each year just goes faster and faster...
I don’t want to make this a complaint on how fast the world goes and how fast life happens. I’m actually having a great time and truly enjoying every day.
I have this mixed feeling of how fast things go and also how slow they seem to move.
I realized that I remember each moment much better when I look back at this year as if I were more centered and present each day. Which I know I did. And that made the difference on how I enjoyed and remembered each moment much better.
But anyway, as I said, I’m not planning to talk here about time passing. I want to talk about the upcoming holidays.
All the family gatherings and celebrations. All the bombardment of shopping, gifts, decorations, wish lists, turkeys, casseroles, seafood, grilling and visits from friends and family...
I don’t know about you but when this time of the year arrives, I tend to be a lot more stressed.
How do you handle the holidays? Do you get stressed out just thinking about it?
For me, first it’s choosing where will we spend the holidays. Since all my family is back in Spain, and Robert’s family is spread all over the world, we need to make a choice. Are we traveling or are we bringing the family to our place? Or, are we doing nothing? What is it going to be?
After that decision is made, then it’s about finding good priced tickets, selecting the dates, picking what would we be doing when we travel, visiting any other places? Getting with old friends? Visiting uncles, aunts...of course each of these decisions come with more stresses...
If we are visiting other places, where would we stay? How much is the budget? Do we have enough days to visit everyone?
What if we miss someone?
And, if we stay and our family comes over, what are we going to do? Stay at the house, going somewhere else, celebrating and inviting friends over? Do we need to rent a bigger car to drive everyone around? How many days should I take off for the holidays?
Slowly but surely the stress goes up…
Then comes the gifts, are we buying things for everyone? How do we send the gifts? When can we go and actually do the shopping? (Luckily, I use online shopping, thank God for it!!!). What to buy??? More importantly, what to buy that can be shipped and the shipment is not more expensive than the gift...
Adding more anxiety to the mix…
Once the location is chosen, the travel plans are selected, comes the preparation. If the family is coming over, now we’ll need to clean and organize the house.
Not that is a hot mess right now, but I do need to clean up the guest rooms, make sure they are ready, get ready of clutter that I’ve been wanting to get rid off. I’ll need to think about logistics for getting everyone from the airport and back, ensure I have ready all the bedsheets, towels, and normal stuff that they will need...
As I am writing this out, I can feel the anxiety creeping in. So many things to do, so little time!!
Have you ever felt this way? Are you overwhelmed when this time of the year gets closer? Or do you handle it with grace and ease?
What is it that makes us so stressed out?
For me, one of the things is having so many things in my to-do list. It feels overwhelming to think about all the stuff to do and how we are going to make sure it gets done on time when we already have so many other things on our plates.
Other thing that I find is stressing me out is imagining all the possible things that could go wrong…I start thinking about the “what ifs”. Seeing possible scenarios of things going sideways just stresses me out even more…
So, what do I do to avoid getting trapped in all these negative and stressful states?
First, I meditate daily, finding time to be in silence, which I find very relaxing.
I also do things that I like, whether it is a walk outside, a workout at the gym, dancing or a yoga class. It doesn’t matter if I have too many things on my plate, including something that I like to do it’s a priority that helps me keep my sanity.
And, lately, the one thing that I’ve found helps me out and it’s quite simple is to repeat a mantra that prompts me on being present instead of living in the future of “what ifs…”
Whenever I start to feel the anxiety creeping in about all the things I need to do, I repeat to myself “One thing”.
This simple sentence is very soothing for me, because it reminds me that I only need to focus on one thing at a time.
It centers me and gets me to focus on the one most important thing that I have to do at that determined moment.
I stop thinking about everything else that I need to do and I select the one thing to do in that precise moment.
It also allows me to stop imagining the future and resettle in the now, into the one thing I’ve chosen to do.
How have I used it so far?
Well, when I started thinking about the holidays and all the different possibilities, I reminded myself “one thing” and I focused on making the first decision, the most important decision first. That was for me to choose between going somewhere or staying and bringing my family for Christmas.
So, we made our choice. One-choice-at-a-time. Decision made: my family is coming.
Then, it was about travelling choices, dates, prices, how many days…and, again, I focused on “one thing”, which in this case was finding flights for my parents. And so I did.
Little by little, one by one you need to select what is the most important thing to do at each moment. Take only one step at a time, focus on the “one thing”.
Whenever I start feeling anxious about all the things I need to do before my parents arrive, I remind to myself again and again, “just one thing”.
Then I pick and do one thing to get me moving forward.
It doesn’t really matter what is that one thing at this point.
It matters that I make a choice and start doing something.
What matters is that I keep my mind in the present instead of fantasizing and stressing in a future that I can’t control.
To summarize, to handle the stress during the holidays try these habits:
Take a few minutes each day to do something that keep you calm: breathing, walking, meditating…
Do something that brings you joy.
Take one step at a time. Focus on “one thing”
Act on what you can control.
As I said, it’s simple and for me it works. How about you? Do you have any specific routine that helps you relax? Is there anything special you do to lower your stress during these holidays? I’d love to hear from you, so please share your thoughts below!!
xoxo,
Sofia