How to start feeling happier daily

It’s a wonderful day, smile! That is the message I saw in the board of the elementary school in my neighborhood. 

At first, when I read it, I thought it was a good reminder for all of us. But then, it got me thinking a little bit deeper. 

The message seems very simple and uplifting, but I realized that it’s not what it resonates with me anymore…

The problem I have with that message is that it’s saying that I should be happy because it’s a wonderful day, but, to me, I should be HAPPY REGARDLESS of what the day looks like!

You see, what it’s underlying in that message is that your happiness is subject to outside circumstances, that you should smile when it’s a nice day, when something goes right, when something good happens… And, of course, there is nothing wrong with smiling and being happy when good things happen. But that should not dictate your overall mood. 

You are the one that CHOOSES to be happy regardless of good things or bad things happening.

You are the one in control of your SMILE and how you want to share it. 

When you start depending on outside circumstances to make you smile, you lose control and you are at the mercy of others to make you happy. Do you want that?

You are the one that DECIDES to be happy no matter what. You are who’s in control and who chooses how to react to everything that happens to you.

A simple message like that, it seems innocent, but it covers up how we are being conditioned to measure our happiness with external things. 

I’ll be happy when I get the bigger car, or the bigger house, or the latest laptop, or when I’m promoted, or when it’s sunny outside, or whenever it is that I think will bring me happiness…

You should start paying attention to all these “I will be happy…when I…” because this is only postponing your life and avoiding you being present and enjoying the moment.

If you’ll only reach happiness one day, when that day comes, you might not even enjoy it, because you were too busy chasing it and you didn't enjoy the journey. Then, when you reach the objective, you are just looking for the next one and you are never in the moment. 

So, to me, I think the message in that school board should read “Smile, and make your day wonderful”.

It is YOU who DECIDE every morning how your day is going to be. You can make that decision after you wake up, you can choose how you respond to someone’s criticism, or how you’ll handle the traffic nightmare when you go to work.

Are you choosing to smile no matter what? Or are you choosing to complain and be upset? 

The interesting thing is that smiling is not just a metaphor for your happiness and how you choose to react to life, but it’s also been proven that when you smile, when you physically turn your cheeks up, your lips wide and create a smile, (even when you don’t feel like it), your brain creates the feel-good neurotransmitters (dopamine, endorphins and serotonin) and instantly releases them into your bloodstream, making your body RELAX and lowering your heart rate and blood pressure.

So, choosing to smile no matter what, independently of how the day looks like, brings you physical benefits in addition to the mental ones.  Knowing all these benefits, why don't you take RESPONSIBILITY and choose to smile no matter what? 

Don't get me wrong, I know there are many situations where it’s difficult to choose happiness and forget about the worries and all the problems.

I’m not that naïve, but I also know that there are many people living under very hard circumstances that are still able to see the light in their life and those are the people I admire. 

If you haven’t read, “Man’s search for meaning” by Viktor Frankl, I highly recommend it. He was a survivor in a Nazi’s concentration camp and even in this terrible situation he was able to find a purpose in life and find meaning in it, he found that you could choose CHANGING your ATTITUDE when you are faced with situations that you cannot change, even in such a horrible situation.

Can I do this every day or maybe most of the days? That's my goal.

I try to be happy and find the LIGHT even when it’s raining outside. Sometimes is easier than others, but I keep trying.  Are you WILLING to try it?

How do you start feeling happier daily?

One of the ways it helps me focusing on the good is being GRATEFUL. To realize how much I have every day makes me be thankful and being grateful instantly makes me happy.

It’s a practice you can do silently and it doesn't take much time.

I say thanks for my husband, for my family, for my friends, my food, my health, my job… I am aware of how much I have and that makes be grateful, because I know there are millions of people that are not that fortunate. 

It wasn't always like this for me. I used to wait until it was sunny outside to feel good, I wasn't aware of my many BLESSINGS and I used to mull over what I don't have instead of what I have. I was focused on what I was lacking and that was making me sad. 

When I switched my focus to being grateful for what I have, it all changed and now I’m able to ENJOY every moment more vividly because I choose to do so.

Don’t wait for a sunny day, TAKE THE SUN WITH YOU whenever you go, that’s the only way to enjoy the journey!

I know some days will be easier than others, but I also know that the next day, you can start over and you can make your choice again and it’ll be a sunny day for you. IS TODAY A SUNNY DAY FOR YOU?? 

 xoxo,

Sofia